Crime Victim Services Support Group Program Philosophy

Crime Victim Services understands the devastating effects Domestic Violence can have on a persons life, as well as on the lives of their children. Therefore, we felt it necessary to establish a support system for those who have fallen victim to this ongoing abuse. Crime Victim Services is a non-profit organization, therefore all services are free to the client.

The fundamental goal of the group is to teach a firm belief in basic rights for all persons, an understanding of and ability to set boundaries, and the development of assertiveness skills. We believe that although anyone may have a brief involvement with an abuser, a woman who possesses this basic foundation of rights, boundaries, and assertiveness skills will never be a chronic victim of domestic violence.

The focus of the support group is on the victim herself and the power she does possess to change the course of her life. It is our belief that this focus is essential in helping women build the energy and motivation needed to begin confronting her problems. A goal of the group is to help these women understand the problems of the abuse and its existence of problems for the entire family, to become aware of their lifelong patterns, to set realistic goals, and to learn techniques for developing new patterns of their own choosing.

The support group is not group therapy. Clients who are not already in counseling are frequently referred for psychological help. Referring for counseling never implies that the women is "crazy" or that she is responsible for the abuse; rather it recognizes that anyone suffering from severe stress, pain, and grief and having to make critical decisions can benefit from psychological help.

Our goal for the group is also to provide a safe, challenging, and supportive environment in which interactive learning can take place. We hope to provide understanding of the abuse and its dynamics, to allow victims of abuse to see in a clear perspective the negative impacts of the abuse, and to introduce practical tools for changing these patterns. The support group offers education, support, and practice in developing these skills and techniques for positive change, but it does not pretend to be an answer for all problems connected with domestic violence. The process of change will not be accomplished overnight. The first step in correcting the problem is to identify it and begin to understand it.

The group experience permits abused women to meet other women in the same situation and relieves the feeling of total isolation from which so many abused women suffer. The group members encourage one another in the learning process and share the excitement and challenge of change. Participants draw strength and determination from one another.

Children's Support Group / P.A.L.S. - Preventing Abuse and Living Safe

Program Philosophy:

Crime Victim Services recognizes that children are also being affected by the abuse occurring in their homes, either directly or indirectly. We believe that young people have the right to live a life free from physical, verbal, and emotional abuse.

A home that is characterized by physical, emotional, sexual, or property abuse is a frightening, debilitating and unhealthy environment in which to raise children. Children who live in such homes are often not able to be children. All children who witness domestic violence are affected.

Children interpret the experience of witnessing violence in different ways. Factors that determine how the children are affected include: how they have learned to cope and survive with the stress of living in a violent home; to what extent they have supports and to what extent they use supports. These factors influence how deeply the violence affects each child.

It became Crime Victim Services mission to establish for these children a nonthreatening environment where they would feel comfortable communicating their thoughts and feelings honestly, where they could be listened to in a compassionate manner and gain the understanding that they are not alone. We do not condone or practice the use of any verbal abuse or verbal threats of physical abuse by anyone.

Through the continued participation in group, young people will gain respect for themselves and others. They will also gain an understanding of the violence they have experienced, prepare a safety plan to protect them in the event of further episodes of violence in the home, and gain the confidence to make choices for themselves. They will be educated on the dynamics of domestic violence in efforts to prevent the cycle of violence from continuing into their adult lives

Our hopes are that young people will be able to complete the group knowing their choices are supported, they are not alone in their experiences, and that they have a safe place to discuss their feeling and experiences. They will have gained the understanding that every person, no matter their cultural background, socioeconomic status or special needs, has inherent personal rights including: equality, respect, freedom to make choices, and the right to live in a violence free home.

Weekly Topics of Discussion

The groups are scheduled to meet weekly at a confidential location, so as to ensure the safety of our members. At each meeting, a specific focus topic will be discussed. These topics have been carefully chosen for there relevance in the fight to recovery from the abuse. The following is the list of weekly topics:

1. Uncovering Healthy Supports - One of the most difficult aspects of Domestic Violence is that although Domestic Violence is wide-spread, the victims often feel isolated and alone in their struggles. The goal of group is to assist group members in breaking the silence and finding healthy supports
   
2. Discovering and Exercising Personal Rights - It is our belief that we all possess certain basic rights in our lives. These rights are not selfish; they belong to everyone. It is the goal of this group to help develop understanding and acceptance of these rights. These basic rights must be understood before the victim is able to change old patterns of abuse and victimization into a new pattern of controlling her own life.
   
3. Overcoming the Effects of the Abuse and Defining Who was Responsible - Abuse is always 100% the responsibility of the abuser. There is absolutely nothing the victim could have done that could make him/her deserve to be abused. No one deserves to be abused - not mentally, physically, or sexually. It is the goal of this group to deal with feelings of responsibility, and help the victim understand who was actually responsible for the abuse.
   
4. Understanding the Cycle of Violence and Its Impact on Our Children - In abusive relationships, the abuse becomes a pattern. This pattern is referred to as the "Cycle of Violence." Every abusive relationship has it's own character, but the cycle or pattern is the same. The focus of this group is to learn to identify the cycle, and discover ways to break it.
   
5. Understanding and Coping With Feelings of Anger, Guilt, Loss, and Grief - Anger is one of the most difficult feelings for abused women to confront in themselves. For many abused women, their anger has been under such total control for so long that the women are often unable to feel it at all. However, anger is energy, and when suppressed and turned inward it can be felt emotionally or physically. Inwardly turned anger is a primary cause of extreme depression. It is the goal of this group to help women identify their anger, and use it as a motivation to produce positive outcomes for themselves.
   
6. Constructing Healthy Boundaries and Redefining Healthy Family Roles - Boundaries are limits drawn by each of us that define our separateness, uniqueness, and basic rights. They should never be overstepped. Developing boundaries is an important step toward being free from the abuse, as well as increasing self-esteem. Lack of boundaries is a prerequisite for abuse. Anyone may be abused once, but if boundaries are clearly in place, there is not a chance of becoming a chronic victim. It is the goal of this group to help the members develop their boundaries.
   
7. Building Healthy Relationships - A relationship grows gradually in health and strength because two people commit themselves to it and both work hard and patiently to achieve a give and take balance. It is impossible to have a healthy relationship with an abuser who will not admit his problems or seek help for them. It is the goal of this group to prevent these persons from becoming involved in other abusive relationship.
   
8. Rebuilding Self-Esteem and Positive Assertiveness Skills Training - Assertiveness skills teaches to set and enforce boundaries. These skills need to be taught or modeled and once learned, can lead to successful feeling of control and empowerment. The use of assertiveness skills helps reverse the cycle of abuse, frustration, and low self-esteem that occurs when one cannot claim rights or set boundaries. It is the goal of this group to help survivors realize that they deserve the best.
   
   
   

The children's group concentrates on the same focus topics, but at a child's level. The main focus again for the children's group is prevention and helping the children develop a healthy self-esteem.